The road of life twists and turns and no two directions are ever the same. Yet our lessons come from the journey, not the destination.
—Don Williams, Jr., American Novelist
When I veered off onto the parenting road a decade ago, I didn’t expect it to be quite so…difficult to drive, shall we say.
I figured I’d have to get another car. Maybe pack some healthier snacks. But all in all, I assumed I’d be the same person amid different scenery.
Ha!
Having kids not only put me on a different road, it may as well have put me on a different planet. Friends who had been thrilled with my pregnancy weren’t equally thrilled with the result — babies not being the best accessory for those without kids.
Then, nine months after our daughter’s birth, we moved from Minnesota to Texas — polar opposite states in terms of motherhood. In Minnesota, a majority of mothers with children younger than five are in the workforce; in Texas, a majority are not.
Suddenly I found myself without a job, without a support network, and without any semblance of what I was supposed to be doing with my life. Of course, I did the usual post-natal soul searching and acknowledged that a fundamental part of me had, indeed, changed — the problem was, I didn’t quite know who the new mama-me was, where she was going, or how she was supposed to get there. So I wandered around Austin every day, hitting parks and pools and Target, hoping for some sort of…epiphany.
Eventually —truth be told, when I was at my absolute wit’s end— I stumbled into a mothers’ group meeting. As epiphanies go, this one was pretty low key. Still, I am not exaggerating when I say the group saved my life.
The women in that group became my fellow travelers and dear friends, helping me to navigate the way (and, yes, even enjoy the scenery) on the Highway O’Parenting.
When I dreamed up the idea to start this magazine, and my road took yet another turn, three of the women in that group —Rebekah Maaz, Nisa Sharma and Andrea Bibeau— asked to get in the car and help me drive. We became a larger, louder, Texan version of Thelma & Louise, without the murder but with plenty of mayhem! Without them, I would have gone over the cliff for sure.
Over the years, their roads also have taken some turns: Rebekah started her own company, Andrea decided to homeschool her children, and now Nisa is venturing out on her own path. And while goodbyes are always sad, I know that every ending is a new beginning — and that our roads always will intersect.
Don Williams got it right when he said that the lessons on the road of life come from the journey not the destination. But I would add that you cannot learn lessons unless you share the road with fellow travelers.
Or, put another way: you gotta grab some passengers —and pick-up some hitchikers! — if you hope to have a decent ride.
This New Year, make a resolution to do exactly that.
I guarantee that, if you follow through on this resolution and reach out to some kindred spirits, you’ll have the greatest ride of your life.
Happy New Year….may it bring you peace, prosperity, and the happiness of having a carload of crazies to share the drive!
With love and luck to Nisa….
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